Broken.

For certain social utilizations, Facebook is incredible. It's also a great way to waste time, iffn you have time to waste. But other times, Facebook is absolutely terrible. Like tonight....stupid Facebook just inadvertantly informed me that the boy I adore more than anything is "in a relationship." I'm shattered. Absolutely destroyed. I tried so hard to make right with him, after foolishly, naivelly, and painfully (on my part, too) letting him go. But to no avail. And he never let me explain myself, and for as many times as I told him I never stopped caring, he never told me when he did. I don't know when sadness gave way to anger and when that gave way to apathy, or whatever. But now Facebook has just implied that I no longer matter to someone who matters a rediculous amount to me. This hurts so bad.

The only thing saving me is that its a holiday weekend and I work for the government, meaning two days off, thus creating a four day weekend and four days of huge solo rides where I will hope to get lost somewhere in Pisgah, and this emotional pain will give way to the more tolerable pains of hunger, fatigue, and fear.

I am so absolutely broken up about this. I hate growing up.